The "I" word

The recent tragic death of 26-year-old Anna Sebastian Perayil has raised more questions than we will find timely answers for.  Terms such as “work pressure” and “stress” have been mentioned in multiple forums.  What truly ‘caused’ her death may, unfortunately, never be fully established in a watertight fashion.  But it does not require a scientist launching spaceships to Mars to piece together the undeniable facts of her story.  And it requires one with a heart as cold as the Arctic Ocean to not be sensitive to what she went through in the months leading to her death.  And what her parents will go through for the rest of their lives.  Amidst all the sadness and all the commentary that I have been reading, there is one word that comes to mind.  And that is impunity. 

The first time that I had truly understood the meaning of the word was when my Aunt Va. Geetha shared with me that the title of her book on sexual violence was, “Undoing Impunity.”  Even though I sort of knew the word, only when she explained to me the essence of the book did I truly understand the gravity that the word carried.  It is a word that I think of quite often when I witness or hear of a demonstration of people ‘getting away’ with things that they should not.  Some of the details that we have read regarding Anna’s work environment clearly point to people abusing the power and authority vested in them.  The people in positions of power clearly did not look at their role as one of an enabler that could shape the life and career of those under them. 

Especially early in their careers, when they are still impressionable, young minds can truly bloom or wither depending on whether they have the support and backing of those more ‘senior’ (I am using that term loosely) to them. Across industries, we have heard old-timers use terms such as “trial by fire” and how their inner core was strengthened by the tough experiences and uncharitable insults that they had endured in their early years.  Many wear it with pride as a badge of honor.  It is a dangerous idea to propagate.  A lot of times, the status quo remains as such because there is no propulsive force to dismantle it.  There is a much smaller set of people that can stomach negativity and channel that into a driving force for their lives than the number of people who crave a positive influence that would enable them to succeed and surge.  Author Daniel Pink wrote of how the primary drivers of motivation are autonomy, mastery and a sense of purpose.  Unreasonable exercise of authority is not even in the ballpark, as you can see.  

Another perilous line of thinking that has been advanced as a way out, in recent times is, “if it doesn’t work for you, quit.”  Yes, on paper, it might sound fair to urge people to place a premium on their health and leave a toxic environment.  As some perceptive people have pointed out, not everyone has the privilege - financial or otherwise - to do everything that they wish to, nor might they have the power or authority by themselves to cause sweeping changes for the better.  Systemic changes will occur only when there is a clarion call that is generated by both people in authority as well as people that are rising up the ranks.  The latter is an especially important group since they aren’t as set in their ways and haven’t accepted certain unhealthy ways of working as the norm.  

One aspect that does not get mentioned often enough in this context is fear.  It is hard to deny that there is a sense of fear and dread that people experience when they do not have the power or the environment that encourages active candor and freedom of speech.  Lack of financial security, social support and many other reasons can drive people into a shell where they silently suffer.  During these times, a support system - professional or otherwise - is a must.  The same society that turns a blind eye to the acts of impunity has absolutely no business in stigmatizing or ridiculing people who seek help for the mental - and physical, I might add - health issues that result from this impunity.  And if we can be that source of support to a sufferer, we must consider it an honor and privilege to be let into their lives.  It behooves us to extend thoughtfulness, sensitivity and empathy towards them as we assume the role of a shoulder that they can lean on.

I am writing this piece with the realization that there are no easy solutions to the issues that people like Anna face(d).  But as we have seen with so many significant movements in history, it all has to start with an honest acknowledgement of harsh realities.  Widespread acknowledgement at that.  If we continue to accept certain realities as immutable, it is akin to a team losing a game before even setting foot in the stadium.  The plea from Anna’s grieving parents should not be just seen as a note to an employer.  Instead, it should be imprinted onto our collective consciousness.  It should be a reminder that toxicity - in whatever form - when unaddressed will lead to disastrous consequences.  The only antidote for that can be a systemic change that lays the foundation for a conducive environment.  An environment where every person has the feeling that those more senior have their back but are not looking over their shoulder.  That way, future generations can subconsciously feel that they have the license to think, to act and to shape up a bright tomorrow for themselves and their microcosm of the world.  All this will eventually lead to them ‘undoing the impunity’ that pervades our society in myriad forms.